I had an amazing day on Wednesday. Here’s a short list of what happened: ~I felt ridiculously frustrated ~I ran to the waterfall and received some pretty calming wisdom ~I met with Leela through the Time Bank who helped me increase that wisdom about 1,000-fold ~Falling into sleep, this phrase burst forth and I was “told” that I wouldn’t get to sleep until I wrote it down because I HAD to remember it: “We feel like we need to be where we’re going to get to before we can start from where we are.” Hence, the question that started this newsletter. Here’s how this all ties together. At this point in my life I am looking for structure, to build a firm base or foundation for putting my gifts out into the world in a tangible and relatable way. It doesn’t really seem to be happening, yet it is happening–just not in the way my ego wanted. That’s where the frustration came from. When I ran to the waterfall, I sat there and let some tears trail down my cheeks. Gosh darnit doesn’t it feel good to do that every once in a while?! I sure think so! While I was sitting there processing and witnessing the water being itself and doing what it does, this thought dropped into my being, “Sometimes the water moves really fast, and sometimes it seems to just sit there, but it doesn’t ever question where it is, it just follows its path. It always gets to where it’s going, but it remains content to be where it is.” Ah, now THAT felt good.
When I met with Leela, a mirror of your deepest wisdom that you can’t see until it’s reflected back to you, I felt nurtured into my being. I felt a deep sense of peaceful awareness that I am exactly where I need to be. My future is about to unfold in exactly the manner it is meant to. Every moment, our future is about to unfold, but every moment is where it all happens. Leela helped remind me that there’s nowhere else I need to be. Most important, I don’t have to have it all figured out right now. Once we figure it all out, we are simply faced with more to figure out anyway. Our destination isn’t the end, but it keeps us going. When we get there, we create a new destination, which keeps us going until we create a new one again.
Next time you feel like you should be somewhere else or more “finished” with your project, I encourage you to soften your eyes. Feel the blood running in your veins and notice how this blood that runs through you is made of the same substance as the stream. Find the place inside you that can tune into the flow of the stream. Watch it run wild with enthusiasm down rocks and cliffs and mountains. And watch it stand still as the landscape of its path flattens out. See it pooling together for some decompression time after it falls fast and furious for awhile, and watch it slowly make its way down its path once again. Ever moving, ever changing, yet ever present exactly where it is. This same presence is always accessible to you.
From Laura’s aMuseLetter 5/11/12. Read the full aMuseLetter.

